Reclaiming our Stories: Rebekah

By Tobi Fleck 

Read more of Rebekah's story: Genesis 24; 25:21-34; 26:1-17; 27 

Genesis 24:57-61

They [Laban and Bethuel] said, “We will call the girl, and ask her.” And they called Rebekah, and said to her, “Will you go with this man?” She said, “I will.” So they sent away their sister Rebekah and her nurse along with Abraham’s servant and his men. And they blessed Rebekah and said to her, “May you, our sister, become thousands of myriads; may your offspring gain possession of their foes.” Then Rebekah and her maids rose up, mounted the camels. And followed the man; thus the servant [of Abraham] took Rebekah and went his way.

At the beginning of my internship, I had the wonderful experience of working with one of the local Jewish Rabbis on an interfaith project. After the project was finished, she told me that I was free to stay in touch, as she understood how difficult transitions to new cities could be. This prompted a continuing resolution to myself that whenever possible, I would attend Shabbat on Friday night. While there were many parts of Shabbat I loved, one practice stood out to me. During the Avot, not only are the male ancestors (Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob) named, but so were the women! Every Friday, we remembered Sarah, Rebekah, Rachel, and Leah. Naming them every Friday rekindled my curiosity as to the stories of these pillars of faith. 

So, here’s an overview of the beginning of Rebekah’s story. Abraham, being very old and having watched his wife Sarah die, sends out his trusted servant, whose name we do not know, with specific instructions to travel back to Abraham’s homeland in search for a wife for Abraham’s son, Isaac. It cannot be someone of Canaanite descent, but must be someone from Abraham’s own tribe. Once the Servant reaches Abraham’s homeland, he prays to God for success in his task and asks for signs. And, sure enough, almost as soon as he was done praying, a woman, our Rebekah, walks up and fulfills all of the signs he asked of God. Better yet, she was indeed of Abraham’s kin!

The Servant goes with Rebekah to her family home and shares his story with Rebekah’s family. The whole story, from Abraham commissioning him to go forth, to his conversations with God, and Rebekah’s role in fulfilling it all. 

And then, we get to the part that still amazes me. Rebekah is asked for her consent. We hear her voice said “I will.” Now, in today’s day, that might seem like a no-brainer. Of course it would be her decision if she’d go and marry someone she’d never met, who lives in a different country. But in scripture, rarely do we hear of women making these choices, let alone literally hear their voices say the words. Rebekah’s voice here is important, and important to acknowledge. 

There are tons of discussion questions that could take place around the story of Rebekah. Questions surrounding Abraham’s choice to find a kinswoman for his son’s wife. Questions around the rivalry between Israel and Canaan. And how that might relate to modern day rivalries. Or maybe questions about times you have asked God for help in a task- times you’ve asked for signs and have they been given to you. 

Often, we only hear one side of a story, particularly the dominant, privileged side, but today I want you to ask yourself: Whose voices do I hear often? What stories do they tell? Whose voices don’t I hear? What stories might they tell? And how has this played into the entrenched racism rampant in our own country? 

White folx: There are many resources out there to help you begin to hear other voices, other lived experiences. I would encourage you to take some time this week to pick up a book, or download an audio book, or visit a website, and listen to voices you’ve not heard before. 

Prepare to Repent - Redeemer Episcopal Church

Matthew 3:1-12 New Revised Standard Version (NRSV)

The Proclamation of John the Baptist

3 In those days John the Baptist appeared in the wilderness of Judea, proclaiming, 2 “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven has come near.” 3 This is the one of whom the prophet Isaiah spoke when he said,

“The voice of one crying out in the wilderness:

‘Prepare the way of the Lord, make his paths straight.’”
x

4 Now John wore clothing of camel’s hair with a leather belt around his waist, and his food was locusts and wild honey. 5 Then the people of Jerusalem and all Judea were going out to him, and all the region along the Jordan, 6 and they were baptized by him in the river Jordan, confessing their sins.

7 But when he saw many Pharisees and Sadducees coming for baptism, he said to them, “You brood of vipers! Who warned you to flee from the wrath to come? 8 Bear fruit worthy of repentance. 9 Do not presume to say to yourselves, ‘We have Abraham as our ancestor’; for I tell you, God is able from these stones to raise up children to Abraham. 10 Even now the ax is lying at the root of the trees; every tree therefore that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire.

11 “I baptize you with water for repentance, but one who is more powerful than I is coming after me; I am not worthy to carry his sandals. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire. 12 His winnowing fork is in his hand, and he will clear his threshing floor and will gather his wheat into the granary; but the chaff he will burn with unquenchable fire.”

_______________________________

This sermon was originally preached by me, Rev. Sarah Locke, at Redeemer Episcopal Church in Jacksonville, Florida on December 8, 2019. You can read the manuscript below, and/or you can listen to the sermon (with infusions from the Spirit) at this link. 

Are you ready? It’s December 8th already. We only have 17 days until Christmas. Panicking yet? 

Even if the weather does not quite show it, it appears that Christmas time is here. Christmas music is playing on the radio, all the displays are out, I saw last Sunday night that Santa is at the mall waiting for his picture to be taken. 

For our college students at UNF and JU, it means finals week is upon us, some of them are graduating, other are gearing up for the seasonal holiday hours at their job. 

For others it means finishing up projects at work or bracing yourself for your children to be out for Christmas break. 

There always seems to be an abundance of things to do to prepare for Christmas: Making lists, checking them twice, if you’re my mother, you’re running around making sure everyone has the exact same number of gifts under the Christmas tree. Lots of other people are still decorating, baking, cooking, and traveling. 

Preparing for Christmas seems a bit more like a sprint than a marathon and, as a pastor, by the end of it, I’m winded and ready to never do it again… until next year. 

But preparing for Christmas seems to look very different than preparing for the coming of Jesus. 

In the text this morning, we hear the words of John the Baptizer, the man who was called and sent to prepare people for the coming of Jesus. Like a prologue of a book, or a prelude in our worship service, John tells the people what is about to happen. He preps them for something that is better and more important than himself. But it doesn’t sound much like shopping and baking and decorating. 

“Repent,” John says, “for the kingdom of heaven has come near.”

He continues, “I baptize you with water for repentance, but one who is more powerful than I is coming after me; I am not worthy to carry his sandals. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire.”

So what does it mean to John to prepare for Christmas? Well, it means preparing for the coming of Jesus, and he says we won’t be ready for that until we repent and recognize that a Jesus’ birth marks a new age— something wild and new and wonderful that we could never even dream of. 

Repentance is not necessarily the word we would immediately associate with Advent and Christmas preparation. For one thing, here in this Episcopal church, as well as many others across the country, we use the hopeful and anticipatory color blue for Advent instead of the repentant and penitential purple that other congregations might use, the same color we use for Lent in the spring. 

But it seems that repentance is of utmost importance to John, and throughout the gospel according to Matthew, we will see this liturgical year, that it is also very important to Jesus. 

It is important that we prepare our hearts and our minds and our attitudes for Jesus. We are reminded to do this figuratively throughout Advent, but what we will celebrate on Christmas Day is not only the miracle of Jesus coming to be with us in the form of a tiny baby, marking the beginning of the coming of the Kingdom of God, but also looking forward to the day when he will return to us, at the end of time, when Isaiah’s prophecy will be completely fulfilled in God’s promise. 

Repentance, at its core, means to change direction, to pick a different course, to turn around. And that is what John is asking the listeners— and us— to do. John’s sole calling is to alert people to the fact that what they are doing is out of step with God’s purpose and desire for their lives and for all of creation. “You brood of vipers,” John accuses, something new is happening and you’d better be ready for it. And that newness is what Isaiah describes: a time when there will be no predator and prey, no fear or hatred, no anger or rebellion. There will be peace, reconciliation, equity, and grace. Paths that are straight and lives that are full. 

Repentance, John says, turning toward this peace, reconciliation, equity, and grace, is the first step in joining Jesus in this new world and in this new kingdom. 

That is my favorite thing about John the Baptizer. He minimizes himself in order to glorify the one who will come after him. All that he does and all that he is points to the one who will save us with baptism in the spirit, with his birth, life, death, and resurrection. John points to the one who embodies what it looks like for us to repent. 

So how do we prepare for the coming of Jesus? How do we prepare for Christmas? Repent. Be transformed by this age-old story and change direction. Turn from idolatry, violence, injustice, exploitation, slavery, and scarcity— and turn toward devotion, peace, justice, equity, freedom, and abundance— turn toward God and the one whom we await on Christmas morning and on the last day, Christ our Lord. Amen. 

Blessing of the Animals at University of North Florida

You can read the article about our Blessing of the Animals from News4Jax at this link.

On October 4, I preached and presided on University of North Florida's campus for the first time. It was an absolutely wonderful experience and I can't wait to do it again. I love the Blessing of the Animals worship service and I think it is a great way to introduce church to people who might not be very familiar with it. Everything was casual but so very sacred. As we worshipped outside of the Brooks College of Health, we were greeted by not only the various dogs, but also the birds, lizards, and squirrels that live on campus. We listened to the fountain in the background, felt the sun on our shoulders, and heard the breeze rustle through the trees above us.

Below is the gist of my sermon, which included some improvisation and loving on Polar Bear, the monstrous white dog who laid lazily in the front row.

In the summer of 2014, my husband, who was only my boyfriend at the time, and I adopted our sweet dog Cooper. It was a regular outing for us to leave seminary and go snuggle all the dogs we wish we could adopt. We were in school full time and had very little money, so we liked to go fantasize about adopting puppies and older dogs and ALL of the dogs together.

When we walked in that day, Cooper was the first dog I saw-- he was the only dog I saw. He has mange and fleas and heart worms and barely any hair at all. But he was so calm and peaceful. So sad and longing. Just laying there, a little bit like Bear lays here now. So I climbed into the fenced in area with him and pulled him onto my lap and looked up at Daniel and said, "I don't care how we do it, but we're not leaving here without this dog."

And of course, we didn't. He came home with us that very day and we fell deeply in love with him. Since then, he has been teaching me all sorts of things about myself, about creation, and about God.

This is the sort of thing St. Francis found as he interacted with God's creation throughout his life. He understood creation to be a mirror to God. Theologian Richard Rohr calls creation the first Bible-- plants, animals, and all of creation, reflect God's beauty. It teaches us something about God that we cannot even learn from reading the words of the Bible.

God created the world to call us into relationship-- with one another, with creation itself, and, of course, relationship with God.

When we first adopted Cooper, he was very skittish. Despite promising to love him forever and ever, one morning, he slipped right out of his collar and ran off. Then it happened again. And again. And four times. Each time, we chased after him, gathering the whole neighborhood to help us. And each time we brought him back home, soothed him, assured him that he was safe and didn't have to run away. He didn't have to be scared with us, we loved him.

This is like God's love for us-- God is constantly running after us, chasing after us, calling all of the people in our lives to help God search for us, bringing us home, and assuring us that we are safe and that God loves us.

Pets, service animals, comfort animals, and therapy animals teach us about this kind of love, forgiveness, and grace.

In a world where humans are not always a testament to love, forgiveness, and grace, it is a shame that the church only spends one day honoring and blessing these animals and all of creation. Because every single day they are a blessing to us.

Amen.

Relationship Through Prayer - Redeemer Episcopal Church

Trinity icon by Andrei Rublev
There is a place at the table for you.

Luke 11:1-13

He was praying in a certain place, and after he had finished, one of his disciples said to him, “Lord, teach us to pray, as John taught his disciples.” ²He said to them, “When you pray, say: Father, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come. ³Give us each day our daily bread. ⁴And forgive us our sins, for we ourselves forgive everyone indebted to us. And do not bring us to the time of trial.” 

⁵And he said to them, “Suppose one of you has a friend, and you go to him at midnight and say to him, ‘Friend, lend me three loaves of bread; ⁶for a friend of mine has arrived, and I have nothing to set before him.’ ⁷And he answers from within, ‘Do not bother me; the door has already been locked, and my children are with me in bed; I cannot get up and give you anything.’ 

⁸I tell you, even though he will not get up and give him anything because he is his friend, at least because of his persistence (shamelessness) he will get up and give him whatever he needs. 

⁹“So I say to you, Ask, and it will be given you; search, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened for you. ¹⁰For everyone who asks receives, and everyone who searches finds, and for everyone who knocks, the door will be opened. 

¹¹Is there anyone among you who, if your child asks for a fish, will give a snake instead of a fish? ¹²Or if the child asks for an egg, will give a scorpion? ¹³If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!”

_____________________

If you would like to listen to this sermon (with infusions from the Spirit), you can find it at the link here. This sermon was originally preached by me, Rev. Sarah Locke, on July 28, 2019 at Redeemer Episcopal Church. 

Grace and peace to you from God, our Father, who is so radical to invite us into relationship through prayer and allows us to be present in all of our human messiness. Amen. 

On Thursday evening this past week, I hosted a young adult gathering centered around the weird faith questions you sometimes feel too ashamed or silly to ask your priest.

In preparation for that gathering, I opened up my social media about a month ago to friends and my college students to ask me any religious or faith questions they’ve been wondering. It was anonymous and I was amazed by how many questions people had that they’ve never felt comfortable asking before!

I answered the questions as openly and honestly as I could and explained a little bit about why people might ask questions like that. Conversations like these are some of my favorites. It’s what we do with our college students in campus ministry every week— we ask big questions and we help one another sort them out. It is some of my favorite ministry.

After a few days, another question came in.  

“I don’t understand prayer,” it said, “I pray, but I feel like God already has a plan or answer so what’s the point? How am I supposed to pray?” 

And I let that question sit in my inbox for two days before I finally replied and said, “I promise to answer this question. But… I just don’t have a good answer. I don’t know.” 

And then I let that question sit there for a month. And I never replied to my friend. But I’ve been thinking about that question for an entire month until I opened up the gospel reading for this Sunday and I sighed with frustration, thinking, “Well great, now I’m going to have to try to answer this question.”

So that’s what I’ll do this morning with you all. I’ll attempt to answer this question about prayer that has been asked since the beginning of time, and a couple of other burning questions about prayer, like the ones the disciples had for Jesus in the gospel text this morning: How do we pray? Why do we pray? What’s the point? 

Do you ever think that the disciples got tired of Jesus never giving them a straight answer for anything? They ask him seemingly important and direct questions and he says, “let me tell you a story…” I imagine the disciples turning to one another after most of Jesus’ stories and going, “did you understand any of that? No? Okay great, me either.” 

Jesus does answer the disciples at the very beginning of this passage though. They say, “teach us to pray” and he recites a prayer for them to use each time they talk to God. And it’s the same prayer, more or less, that the church has been using for thousands of years. 

So, good for Jesus for finally giving them a straight answer. But then, because of course he can’t just stop with a simple answer, Jesus goes on to tell this story of a man and his sleeping neighbor. And the reason Jesus tells this story is that when the disciples asked Jesus to teach them to pray, they weren’t really asking for a prayer they could recite. What they wanted to know was about their relationship with God. 

Before then, if a person had the good fortune to encounter God, they were known to drop dead immediately. But somehow Jesus had this sort of normal, casual relationship with God and the disciples were curious about it. And as Jesus tells this story, he invites the disciples into an intimate relationship with their creator— that must have sounded blasphemous at best and downright ridiculous at worst.  

In this text, Jesus tells the story of a visitor has just arrived at a man’s house and he has nothing to feed him. So this man walks over to his neighbor’s house in the middle of the night, wake him up, and asks him for some bread. The text we read says that because of his persistence, the man gets up and gives him whatever he needs. But a better translation would be shamelessness. Because this man is so shameless in coming to ask for bread in the middle of the night, the neighbor gets up and gives him whatever he needs. 

And it *is* shameless isn’t it? Imagine the kind of relationship you must have with your neighbor to go pounding on their door in the middle of the night? I know people who have been living in the same house their entire lives and they don’t have that kind of relationship with their neighbors. It’s shameless and vulnerable to go to a person in the middle of the night and ask for bread. 

You see, I don’t think Jesus is teaching his disciples about what kind of prayers to pray, or even the frequency or urgency with which to pray. Jesus is telling a story about the kind of relationship we are invited into by the Holy Spirit. Unlike ever before, the disciples were invited to be vulnerable and shameless before God. 

When the disciples say, “Lord, teach us to pray,” what they are really saying it, “tell us about our relationship with God.” And Jesus gives them the most well-known prayer in all of Christianity, a prayer that begins with “Father.” Not “Lord,” or “Almighty” or any other number of names for the our most holy and ever gracious God, but Jesus invites his disciples and invites us to call God “Father,” “Abba,” “Dad.”  

We are called into a relationship with God that is more than an almighty ruler and servants. Even more than creator and created. We are invited into a relationship so intimate that Jesus says we can ask anything of God. And God says that this relationship is so good and wonderful that God will not only gives us everything we need in this life, our daily bread, but God will also give to us the Holy Spirit. 

You see, prayer is not about how, or why, or when we pray. The invitation to prayer is an invitation into a relationship with the Trinity, an invitation into a relationship with God, the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. 

It is the same invitation that allows us to come to this table and eat the body and blood of Christ Jesus. It is the same invitation that dips us into the waters of baptism and renews our spirit. And God in Christ has already accepted this invitation for us, we don’t even *have* to respond. 

But we get to. We have the incredible privilege of reaching out to our creator, the one who was, and is, and will be forever more, the one who created the interstellar workings of the entire universe. And more than that, God listens. God wants to be in relationship with us and even more, the only reason we are able to reach out to God and be in this relationship is because God first began this relationship with us. In the very beginning. And continued that relationship despite our nonsense, when God sent God’s very self in Christ Jesus to be with us, journey with us, die on the cross, and be raised again for the forgiveness of our sins. That God— our God— as ridiculous as it sounds, wants us to be in relationship, to talk, and listen, and converse with us. That’s wild and full of grace and mercy and it truly doesn’t make much sense, but it is true. 

God created you and adores you and wants to be in relationship with you. 

So I’m sure I didn’t answer the question of prayer any better or more clearly than Jesus did, but I hope that you hear prayer as an invitation into a vulnerable, shameless, and holy relationship with our God, who created the entire expanse of the universe and cares enough about you to call you beloved and be present with you in all things through the Holy Spirit. Amen. 

Strive for justice and peace in all the earth

"To strive for justice and peace in all the earth is a kind of crescendo at the end of our baptismal commitments. To paraphrase the Gospel according to John, when 'people love darkness more than the light' (3:19), we don’t respond with condemnation but instead by shining Christ’s light to expose the weakness of the shadows." 

This is how Rev. Drew Tucker, the University Pastor at Capital University describes the final baptismal promise. 

Finding time to care about-- let along do anything about-- justice and peace while we are in college can feel incredibly overwhelming. I have heard a lot of critiques of my generation (millennials) and the generations after mine. Whether we are snowflakes, self-absorbed, social media crazed, obsessed with avocado toast, or killing various restaurant chains and industries, there seem to be many reasons to complain about college students these days. Many older people assert that things should just go back to the "good old days" before complications like smart phones and empathy. 

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't critical of my own and younger generations at times, but I find so much hope in young adults today as well. It is probably the reason I have a passion for young adult and campus ministry. Not a day goes by that the deep convictions and empathy of people younger than myself teach me to be more like Jesus. 

Indeed, campus ministry is often where the journey in pursuit of justice and peace begin for many people. Josh Hayes, a previous student at Jacob's Porch puts it this way: 

"Campus ministry was where I first heard the term social justice. Nearly everyone I know from JP (Jacob's Porch) is still extremely active in the realm of justice and the pursuit of peace. Though it can be difficult to work toward justice, the knowledge of what it means to those who have been treated unjustly is the most compelling call to action."

Pastor Tucker confirms this idea that sometimes campus ministry is where the roots of justice and peace take hold of God's children and refuse to be pulled up.  

"In my various experience in Lutheran campus ministry, I’ve seen students take the lead on including people who identify as LGBTQ+ fully in the life of the church. I’ve seen campus communities open their empty housing to refugee families in need. I’ve seen white, straight, cisgendered, male students use their privilege to center the voices of people of color, women, immigrants, and others typically marginalized in our society. Most recently, I’ve been invited to celebrate the transition of a student in worship with an affirmation of baptism that honors God's grace offered long before the transition and is now experienced anew in the fullness of his life. For me, campus ministry is where the light of God’s call for justice and peace pierces the shadowy veils of judgment with God’s expansive, inclusive love."

As busy as college students often are, I and others have witnessed over and over again the drive and passion that students have for seeking justice and peace in the places and times they live in today. I have never heard a student say, "I know there is a lot of suffering in the world, but I can't do anything about it now. Let me wait until I graduate." Rather, I more often hear students say things like, "I know there is suffering and injustice in the world, and right here on this campus. How can I be a part of the change right now?"

Although campus ministry doesn't always get it right and we have a long way to go to look like the Kin-dom of God, I love being able to reply, "by joining in what we are doing at campus ministry, you can help us change not only this community but this campus and the world."  

My education after seminary

I had never worked in the food industry before this spring. I don't regret having to work in a restaurant as a hostess to make ends meet. We have to do what we have to do between graduation and first call. I've learned a lot and come to appreciate the service industry even more than I did before. That saying (I don't know if it's actually a saying) that "everyone should work in the food service industry at least once," is very true.

So here are some things I have learned while working in a restaurant...


Ice cream solves a multitude of problems. My manager's go-to move when someone is upset or an order is made wrong (over and over again) is to send the table ice cream (actually gelato because we think we are fancy). And let me tell you, people are totally into it. They are delighted to get free ice cream after their meal. The other day, we had a little girl come in with her parents and she was just WAILING. She wanted ice cream and she wanted it about ten minutes ago. As I sat them, I mentioned to her mother that we have gelato (pft). The wailing stopped as the gelato-posing-as-ice-cream was delivered. Ice cream solves everything, y'all. It just does.

Your education means nothing if you aren't nice. I was chatting with a fellow hostess, exchanging stories, and asking about her life. She said she is currently working at Tazza because she just got out of a bad relationship and had to move back in with her parents. As I mentioned that I had just finished my master's degree. "How old are you?" she asked. I replied that I'm 25. She said, "I feel so under-accomplished! You're younger than me and you have a master's degree!" I was quick to point out that we are both working the same job for the same wage. Education means absolutely nothing when you're in the same lot in life.

The 5/10 rule makes a lot of sense in real life. In restaurant business there is a rule that says if someone is within ten feet of you, you should acknowledge the person with a smile or a "hello." If you are within five feet of a person, you should greet them and offer to assist them. As an introvert, it is really easy for me to dip my head when people walk down the street or greet me in a grocery store. Since working in a restaurant, I have greeted a lot more people in my day to life. This is also a "rule" that I think is invaluable in ministry, whether we tell our worship greeters about the "rule" or using it in our lives everyday.

People just want to be treated like human beings. Whether it is the chef, the line cooks, the host, the servers, or the guests, we simply want to be treated like human beings. Whatever that means to you might vary, but to me it means that people who are in the service industry are people. People who go to eat in restaurants are people. It's not super complicated. I don't think that one person is any better than the other. Sure, I work in a restaurant where I can't afford the food, but that doesn't mean I should be treated like a someone who is less than human. It's probably too much to ask, but you know, I'm an optimist.

Keep your feet underneath you. I'm not the most graceful person in the world. I was slipping and sliding on the kitchen floor the other day and someone said, "keep your feet underneath you." That sounds like common sense, but it's more about not cutting corners or going too fast. And I can really use that advice. I'm pretty good at going too fast and forgetting to take a look around and appreciate my life.

So I guess what I'm saying is that I'm really enjoying working at the restaurant, and it is teaching me a lot. I hope I don't have to work there forever, but I'll take these lessons with me into ministry and whatever is next in life.

A Reflection, a Farewell

Every Tuesday night I have the privilege of leading a bible study at the house of some of my wonderful parishioners. We start around 9pm and end as close to 10pm as I can get us without going too far into the night. Then we gather in the kitchen to continue to chat and eat whatever delicious food and sweets are present that night. By the time we leave (often somewhere between 10:30 and 11pm), I am so sleepy and stuffed that I zone out as another couple drives me home.

A few nights ago, we had bible study, realized that we only have a few weeks left together, and scheduled our very last bible study (which will end up being us gathering for food and possibly talking about Jesus a little bit). That evening as we drove home, I noticed the odd sound of country music coming over the Malaysian radio station. Thomas Rhett's "Die a Happy Man" washed over my ears and I smiled. Oo how I miss country music and seeing the stars at night and bonfires. I felt ready and eager to be "home" in the United States.

Then as I kept listening to the lyrics, I felt sorrow and maybe even regret. It's hard to name exactly the emotions that flooded into my heart, but it wasn't the joy of leaving, it wasn't the excitement of seeing my family at home.

"If I never get to see the Northern lights
Or if I never get to see the Eiffel Tower at night
Oh, if all I got is your hand in my hand
Baby, I could die a happy man"

The premise of the song is that this man has some "bucket list" items, but he sings that even if he doesn't get to do all of those things, he would "die a happy man" just because he gets to spend his days with this woman. I know this feeling all too well. Daniel and I used to move the furniture and dance in the living room. Or we would turn his small apartment into a movie theater. We went on some pretty incredible dates, but my favorite times together have been when we didn't have to spend any money at all. We were just together and happy. We have dreams and plans, but even if they didn't work out, we are still so happy simply being together.

But as I heard this song, I realized that we did get to see our metaphorical Northern lights this year. We did get to see our metaphorical Eiffel Tower at night. And while it's true that our love would be just as incredible and we would be just as happy without these experiences, the truth of the matter is that we have done things this year and seen things that we never could have imagined in our wildest dreams.

And I don't think I've been as grateful as I should have been. I took a lot of it for granted. I think part of it is because I never could have imagined being here and seeing these things this year - or maybe everything happened so quickly that I haven't had a chance to digest it- but I won't use that as an excuse. Until I started to hear that song play over and over in my head, I don't think I fully realized how amazing our first year of marriage has been. Every once in a while we would turn to one another and say, "We are living in Malaysia. How odd the way life turns out," but I don't think it all sank in the way it did the other night.

We saw the famous tea fields of the Cameron Highlands in Malaysia.
We dipped our toes into oceans and seas that I never would have thought we'd visit in our lifetime.
We rode a 40 year old elephant and fed an eight year old elephant!
We watched the sun rise over Angkor Wat.
We watched the sun set on a beach in Bali.
We rode on a crazy cable car in Langkawi and walked on a long curved suspension bridge.
We spent part of Thaipusam at Batu Caves.
We saw the giant reclining Buddha at Wat Pho.
We ate authentic pad thai from a street cart in Bangkok.
We watched a storm roll into the city, sweeping over the Petronas Towers and KL Tower, on the helipad of a skyscraper.
I've preached in three countries and had my sermons translated into several languages.
We went to Universal Studios in Singapore.
We also went to the rooftop pool at Marina Bay Sands and rode the Singapore Flyer.
We had dinner on the rooftop of the #1 restaurant in Phuket.
We shared many of these memories with my parents and Daniel's brother.

And last, but certainly not least, we spent the entire year being welcomed and loved by people who knew nothing about us and committed to helping us grow in ministry, in life, and in love.

This past year has been more incredible, difficult, and surprising than we could have ever imagined. And I think I am just now realizing that this isn't normal. This life is a privilege and an honor. This year has been such an unfathomable blessing from God and I know that we will not soon forget the beautiful memories we have shared in this first year of marriage.

It also gets me excited about what God has in store for us next. We are ready- where will our next adventure lead us?

A Different Way

This is the sermon I wrote the day after the Freddie Gray's funeral in Baltimore. I wrote it with tears in my eyes, with an aching heart. I wrote it because it is what I needed to hear. I preached it yesterday morning. I was terrified to be preaching about something so controversial and I was so blessed by the reception I received...

A few weeks ago when I began writing this sermon, I turned to my friend in the midst of sermon prep and said, “I just don’t have anything new to say about ‘love one another.’”  Now, it seems, I have too much to say, but no way of saying it.  It is with sighs too deep for words that I come before you this morning.  

What are we supposed to do in this world?  I feel helpless.  I feel angry and sad.  As I struggle to get my words on paper, I feel my whole soul sighing in desperation for this world.  “Come, Lord Jesus,” I pray, not really expecting an answer.  

What are we supposed to do in this world?  I am overwhelmed.  I am overwhelmed by the unjustified police violence throughout our country.  I am overwhelmed by the riots in Baltimore.  I am overwhelmed by the hatred I see in Facebook posts and comments from people who I have known to be loving and caring.  I am overwhelmed by the cries of the thousands who are denied their basic rights because of their sexual orientation.  I am overwhelmed by the despair and death in Nepal.  

What are we supposed to do in this world?  We are constantly told that violence is the answer - even when we have ignored the question.  This world tells us that the only way to be heard is to yell louder than our opponent.  We are told that the only way to make it to the top is to lie, cheat, and steal our way there.  This world continues to say that “justice” only applies if you are a part of the majority.  This world is telling us that only some lives matter. 

We cannot believe this world.  In fact, as Christians we DO not believe this world.  We have been baptized into the Body of Christ and we KNOW the truth.  It is not violence that triumphs.  It is not anger and vengeance that prevails.  Hate is not the answer.  

The lies of this world are just that - lies.  We cannot believe them.  No matter how true they feel in this week, in this time, in this place, we must cling to the real truth.  

And the real truth is this: Strength is in weakness.  Triumph is in death on a cross.  The gospel declares that Jesus’ death is the first pivotal moment - the moment where God’s reign breaks into this world.  And God’s reign does not look like this world at all.  The kingdom of God declares that love is the answer, that the way to be heard is to lay yourself down for another.  The kingdom of God calls us to be compassionate, careful, and righteous with our words and our actions.  

Jesus’ life shows us that even when it looks like hatred and violence wins, God is stronger, God prevails, God conquers death and the devil in order to restore the world.  We must not let this world overwhelm us, we must be overcome with Christ’s love.  

When we are overcome with Christ’s love, we see the world in a different way.  When we have the faith to abide in Jesus and he in us, our perspective becomes more holy, more heartbroken.  

I used to pray a very simple prayer when I was in college, “Lord, break my heart for the things that break your heart.”  What I realized was, that is way too hard.  There are too many things that break my heart now.  I am bogged down with the tragedies of this world.  But it gave me new eyes.  And when we become overwhelmed with Christ’s love for the world, we will have new eyes in Christ.  Now I pray that whole world’s heart would break for the things that break God’s heart. 

Because when that happens, when we begin using “God lenses,” we will see a new world.  We will see new answers.  When we see tragedies in this world, such as the earthquake in Nepal, the avalanche on Mt Everest, and the police violence throughout our cities, we will feel them deep within us as personal tragedies.  For they are not just the people of Nepal.  They are not just homosexual and transgender people in cities, they are not just African American people in Baltimore or North Charleston.  Jesus tells us that these people are our brothers and sisters.  And we are called to love them.  In fact, more than that - something that seems quite scandalous - we are called to love them so much that we would lay our lives down for them.  We skip over that line and dismiss it as a metaphor because it seems too hard, the stakes are too high if we say we must die.  

But the stakes are too high.  Our brothers and sisters are dying. They are being beaten to death, abused, denied basic human rights.  Whether the violence of the killing of an unarmed black man, or the violence of rioting in response to it - we are told that this is normal.  Our world tells us that this is okay.  Sin declares that this is how we bring about change.  But I promise you, my sisters and brothers, what the world says is normal is not normal at all.  Violence and hatred are not from God.  They are satanic, they are parasitic to the world that God created for wholeness, peace, shalom.  

We are called to throw away our tribal allegiances - whatever they might be. Jesus tells us in this very passage that there is a different way.  There is a the way of unity, righteousness, and peace.  God’s way is the way of love.  

The redemption of this world will not come from violence.  It will not come from hatred and abuse.  The reign of God does not come in anger and vengeance.  The kingdom of God breaks into this world when despite everything - despite the world telling us that violence is the only answer, that death will continue forever, that hatred is stronger - the kingdom of God breaks into this world when we decide to love. In this world that will continue to tell us we must kill one another, God says that we must die for another.  We are all brothers and sisters in Christ.  There is no “us” and “them.”  

And in this time of overwhelming violence, hatred, pointing fingers, and laying blame - we must remember that God says there is a different way and that it starts with us.  

It starts with this community.  It starts on a small scale - a relationship scale.  This new way of living, the kingdom of God in this world starts when people like you and me decide to love.  Instead of hating, instead of holding a grudge, instead of disregarding people because they look different, love different, or act different from us, we can decide to love.  

God works in small ways.  God is working the hearts of the thousands of volunteers who have gone to Nepal to help in recovery.  God was working through the hands of the people who came out the next morning in Baltimore to clean up the streets.  God is working in the Lutheran church as we continue to work to make our sanctuaries safe places for people of different sexual orientations, races, and backgrounds.  God is working. There is no denying that.  So let us offer up our own hands and feet, our own hearts and souls, in order to live into the love that God has so graciously and freely given us.  The Kingdom of God starts here. In this community.  Loving one another starts with us. 

Slaughtered Sheep

I have a friend who owns a farm out in Pomaria, a very small town outside of Columbia.  One day he got a call from a family asking to buy a sheep.  Skeptical to sell one of his sheep to a stranger, but forever the optimist, he invited the family out to his farm.  The family came, bought the sheep, and asked him if they could have a bucket of water and have a picnic under one of the big trees on the property that afternoon. He agreed and watched a ritual he had never seen before.  

The family prayed over the sheep and calmed it down with their soothing voices.  They slowly revealed a blade and slit the sheep’s throat, allowing the blood to run onto the ground.  When the blood was drained from the sheep’s body, it was skinned, and cut apart so that every single part of the sheep could be used for various things - the skin, bones, stomach - it was all packed away for the family to use later.  They stayed for hours, making sure that every piece of sheep would have a purpose.  When my friend later walked out to the place under the tree where the sheep had been slaughtered, he was surprised to find that there was barely any trace of the sheep left - just a little blood on the grass.  

As my friend told me this story, I asked him, “weren’t you upset that they slaughtered one of your sheep?”  He shrugged and said, “It wasn’t my sheep.  The sheep belonged to them and they can use it however they want to use it. I’m just glad they used the whole thing. Nothing went to waste.”  

When I think about that family and that sheep, I think about all of the parts of an animal that I would have absolutely no use for.  What do you do with the eyes? The horns? The hooves?  Even if you are able to eat most of the meat of the sheep, what are you going to do with the intestines? The bones?  

But the sheep was precious to these people.  They knew the great wealth in using every part of the sheep.  They understood what it meant to own something and use the entire thing.  

The shepherds of Jesus’ time understood this too.  The sheep belonged to the shepherd so the shepherd was able to use the sheep in whatever way he chose.  The shepherd recognized that every single part of the sheep was precious.  Some parts we would expect - bones being made into sewing needles - but some parts being considered so diligently and uniquely - the stomach sew to carry water.  

Nothing was wasted because the shepherd knew that each sheep was precious and worth being used.  He also simply couldn’t afford to waste any part of the sheep.

When the sheep are all you have to secure the future of your family, you are very careful and particular about how you use the sheep.  Without an abundance of healthy sheep, the shepherd would risk the wellbeing of his family.  Without their sheep they would have no livelihood.   

Just as we invest in our future and our family’s future with stocks, bonds, retirements funds, real estate and life insurance, shepherds invested in the future of their family by nurturing a large, healthy flock.  A growing flock meant a future, an inheritance, for the shepherd’s offspring.  

So when we understand how much the flock means to the shepherd, it is no surprise that a good shepherd would lay down his life for his sheep. He is not only protecting his pets or his income, but his future and his family’s future. 

In this passage, Jesus makes a promise to his people, his flock.  He commits his life to the wellbeing of the sheep, he declares that he will do everything it takes to protect them, keep them safe - even to the point to death.  What he is promising is a future - an inheritance for his family. 

But we are not only the inheritors of the sheep - the inheritors of the wool, blankets, and meat that came from the sheep.  Jesus says that we are the sheep.  We are the ones that will be slaughtered and used at the will of the shepherd to whom we belong.  And the crazy part is that God is using not just the good parts, not just our gifts, but also our faults, our failures, our sins for God’s purposes.  God wants all of us - every piece of skin, bone, and stomach - leaving nothing unused.  

I read a news article this week about a new first person video game.  It’s called Outcasted and in the game, the player is posed as a homeless person begging for change in a random location.  There are no levels, no achievements.  The only way you are able to interact with another character is to hold their eye contact, hold out your hand, and ask for money.  The makers of the game hope that it will help people better empathize with the monotony and despair that homeless people feel on a daily basis.  And it has worked.  It is changing the way people walk through their lives, making them think twice about ignoring the man sitting outside the grocery store every afternoon. 

God is using everything - even the weird stuff.  Not just the improved parts of us or the successful parts of us.  Not just our great singing voices or our steady hands.  God is using our quick tempers and our low self esteem.  God is using our deep rooted prejudices and our crumbling marriages.  God can and will use every part of us for God’s purposes.  And sometimes that involves what feels like to be slaughtered.  

Jesus never tells us that we will be shielded from potential danger in the pasture.  He never says that he won’t lead us to the edge of a cliff or into the midst of wolves. But what he does say is that he will gather us in, keep us together.  He will come after us when we stray.  He says that when the wolves come to prey on us - and they will - that he will lay down his life to protect us.  Because we are part of the flock, we can trust that when the Spirit leads us to frightening places, uncomfortable places, Christ is with us.  His voice calls our names and comforts us.  We are protected and provided for.  

Miss Martha is about four foot nine.  She is a tiny, fierce lady in her late sixties. Miss Martha is unemployed.  She lives in a small one-bedroom house in a run down part of the neighborhood with her tiny dog Miko.  She has two industrial sized freezers that stay stocked with chickens, ground beef, and an assortment of vegetables.  Her garage is packed with rice, beans, bread, and anything else a family could want for - “only the healthy stuff,” she tells you with a knowing nod.  

Miss Martha is unemployed, but she is not jobless. Miss Martha feeds all of the hungry families in her neighborhood.  And in that neighborhood, there are more than a few hungry families.  She recognizes her call to be a mother to all, a provider, a nurturing hand and kind heart.  “My call comes from God,” she says, “and my ability to do my call comes from God.”  

Miss Martha makes absolutely no money doing what she does. She is only able to give because of the generosity God has put in the hearts of the people around her.  Several times a week, church members, high schoolers, businesspeople will come through the gate of her chain link fence bearing gifts - bags of food for the neighbors, carts of frozen food, and checks for Miss Martha’s electricity or water. 

I once asked Miss Martha if she ever got worried that she would run out of food for the neighborhood or money to pay her electric bill.  She smiled and said, “Oh no. God made a promise that God would provide. You believe that, you don’t ever have to worry.”  

Miss Martha recognizes that she was being called by God to an uncomfortable, challenging, holy place.  She has faith that God will provide her with everything she needs and in her faith she has the freedom to let herself be used by God.  And God uses her to do God’s will - God uses every part of Miss Martha, the good and the bad, her mistakes and her passion.  Even in the moments of most discomfort - when she receives a late notice on her bill - when she cannot afford to buy food - she trusts in God’s provision.  

Many of us do not have the same trust in God that Miss Martha has.  It is why we cling so tightly to the image of Christ’s hesitation in the garden.  Yes! We know what that feels like.  Yet the cross is so mind-boggling to us.  We cannot wrap our heads around that kind of faith.  Jesus had faith in God that God would provide.  He was able to go to the slaughter with a calm heart and steady hand because he had faith in the resurrection.  He knew that he belonged to God and would be used according to God’s will.  

It is the great paradox of our faith.  In order to follow God, we will be led by the Spirit to uncomfortable places, places that often times look like the cross of Christ.  We are led to these places by the same God that promises to keep us safe, to redeem us and the entire world.  And it is in those uncomfortable places that God most clearly reveals God’s redemptive power.  

Having the faith to be led to these challenging, holy places is what the kingdom of God looks like.  Dwelling in the uneasiness of being slaughtered will change our lives. It will challenge us to shake hands, hug, and sincerely say “peace be with you” to the man who mugged you at the grocery store.  It will challenge us to approach the same communion rail with a person who has abused her spouse or his child.  It will bring us to share a hymnal with the outspoken racist.  It will give us the freedom to lay down our lives for one another so that they might live, so that there might be an inheritance and a future for the ones who come after us.  

Here I Am

It has been a long time since I have written anything.  It turns out that seminary keeps you as busy as everyone says it does!

I just got back from an incredible trip to Haiti where seven of us spent six days in the small village of Yvon building a church.  I am never very good about writing after I come back from trips - it takes me a long time to absorb everything after a trip like that.

But as I reflect on my trip and recover from sleep (and binge watch Netflix), I cannot help but think of the words that our Mary uttered just a few weeks ago in the lectionary.  My sermon might not do it justice, but I keep thinking about how willingly Mary accepted her new journey with God.

Another thing rolling around in my brain is about internship.  Where am I going? Will we have a weekend free to get married? Why hasn't anyone emailed me in over three weeks?

But I do have one assurance.  God is calling me to something different.  And God is there when I take that journey.  No matter where I am called - to Haiti, Argentina, London, or South Carolina - God provides and God journeys with me.  All I have to say is, "Here I am."

So with that in mind, here's a link to my sermon from Advent 4. I had the incredible opportunity to preach in my home congregation over Christmas break.  I heard a lot of people say that it was a blessing to have me preach that morning, but I feel that I have been blessed doubly by such an incredible congregation and the story of Mary that has been resonating in my soul for several weeks.

Generational Love

Ruth 1:1-18

Psalm 146

Hebrews 9:11-14

Mark 12: 28-34

There are 4,200 different religions in the world.  There are 5,000 ethnic groups in the world.  There are 318 MILLION people in the United States alone.  But we aren’t just diverse as a people, we are diverse as generations.  There are more people over 50 living in the United States than any other time in all of history.  That’s pretty awesome.  But it just shows how completely different and spread out people are throughout the country, but also throughout the Church.  If you look around this morning, there are all sort of different people who come from completely different places and live such different lives.  And we are all different ages and grew up in different generations. 

Things are different than they were five, ten, twenty years ago.  I see you smiling.  You know what I’m talking about. Everything has changed - how we communicate has changed from hand-written letters to telegrams to phone calls and text messages.  How we raise our children has changed with electronics and schools transforming.  Even the way we worship has changed.  My parents had no idea what “contemporary worship” meant when they were growing up.  

And let’s be honest, it divides us.  There are many people who love traditional worship, many people who love contemporary.  There are a lot of people who say no cell phones for kids until they are fifteen years old and some who will give in around 8 years old.  Generations are different and I think it’s a good thing.  It is certainly a natural change.  

But there is something that unifies us.  And I think Jesus and Ruth both get to it in these passages.  You heard most of the backstory with Ruth - her husband dies and there is no other relative to take as her husband.  Naomi does such a noble thing there with Ruth - she tells her to go back to her people and find a husband so that she might not have to live a lonely life and a life of poverty.  Naomi didn’t have to give Ruth that blessing... and Ruth certainly could have taken that blessing and left.  But she did something different.  She, because she felt connected to Naomi in a deeper way than just being her daughter-in-law, stays with Naomi and loves her like her own mother.  I think as a church, we can really learn from that.  

They weren’t from the same tribe of people, they didn’t have the same friends.   But something connected them.  Somehow, during their time together, Naomi was able to pass down something so incredibly vital for Ruth, that Ruth wasn’t willing to part from her.  She knew she would live in poverty and that she could never marry another man and have children.  This meant shame and complete loneliness during that time.  But there was a love and connection that kept Ruth from following her sister-in-law back to her old life.  Naomi had instilled in Ruth the traditions of her people and the value of her religion.  

“Do not press me to leave you
    or to turn back from following you!
Where you go, I will go;
    where you lodge, I will lodge;
your people shall be my people,
    and your God my God.

Where you die, I will die—
    there will I be buried.
May the Lord do thus and so to me,
    and more as well,
if even death parts me from you!”

That is beautiful. 

It was the unity of God and the unity of kinship that kept those women together, even through the most difficult time in their lives.  But it wasn’t just the kinship and unity of God, it was love.  Naomi loved Ruth enough to allow her to go back to her family and find another husband and live a fruitful life.  And we know how much Ruth loved her mother-in-law - enough to stay with her and live a life of poverty.  

In the gospel, Jesus tells us that the two most important commandments are to  “love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength” and  "You shall love your neighbor as yourself."

Naomi was able to pass down both of these commandments to Ruth.  

One of the most incredible things we are able to pass down to young people is love.  I believe, as a child of two wonderful parents that the most important thing they taught me was how to love.  They were good at it, after all.  They love each other and they love my brother and me.  I can’t think of a single time growing up that I didn’t feel my parents’ love for me.  And I don’t think that they just woke up on the morning of becoming parents and decided to learn how to love.  It’s something that their parents taught them and their grandparents passed down as well.  Love is something that is almost necessarily passed down from generation to generation.  It is love that we have in common with all of the generations before us and all of the generation after us.  It was the love of God and the love of one another that kept Ruth and Naomi together.  

We have that same type of love that keeps us together as a church body.  We have the love of Christ.  We have a unity of spirit that is able to hold us together through space and time - through the generations and through the diversity of the world.  We have unity because of the Trinitarian God.  God so loved this world and Jesus Christ died for the love of the world.  The Holy Spirit was given to the church to remain and nurture the church.  It was given in order to be a comforter, a guide, and a way to keep the church unified.  

Our response to this gift of love and commitment that our God has given us so freely is these two commandments.  Love God with all of your heart and all of your mind and all of your soul.  And love your neighbor as yourself.  This response is meant to keep the church together and provide real relationship within the church and outside of the church.

We celebrate this unity and this relationship in two sacred ways in the Lutheran church - the waters of baptism and Holy Communion.  Baptism is a reminder that we belong in God’s family.  Communion is a celebration and remembrance that we are in this together.  And the really cool part is that it’s not just this church that is unified in Christ.  We are together with all of the saints and sinners throughout all of time and space.  Our grandparents and great-grandparents.  People who have yet to be born.  Every generation and throughout the entire world, we are all of one spirit in Christ Jesus.  

Things are going to keep changing.  Generations will continue to feel further and further apart.  The world will continue to expand and diversify.  But if we are able to teach people of all ages that the two greatest commandments are to love God with all your heart and all your mind and all your soul and to love your neighbor as yourself, the unity of the spirit in Jesus Christ cannot be broken.  

Biblical Women I'd Rather Be than the Proverbs 31 Woman

You have probably all heard of the Proverbs 31 woman. I have seen so many young men claim that they wish they could find a Proverbs 31 woman to marry. Or others who claim to have found a Proverbs 31 woman and just can't wait to make her their wife! Woohoo!

She is a capable wife.
She imports her food from far away.
She makes all her own clothes.
She gets up really early and cooks for her husband.
She works out.
Her husband is super popular.
She has her own business.
Her husband praises her.
She is submissive.
She lives for the will of her husband.
Oh yeah, and God too.

I don't have a huge problem with all of these things. Fearing God is cool. Owning your own business is pretty swell. But it doesn't say things like "sometimes she does things for herself because she's worth that."  It doesn't say that her husband helps her cook and clean because he recognizes the fact that being a mother and wife is actually pretty difficult work.  It doesn't say that she is independent and courageous.

She lives for her husband and for God.  And probably her children (although they are barely mentioned).

I guess there are worse things to live for.

But I would rather be one of these women of the Bible.

Sarah... obviously Sarah has to be one of my favorite women of the Bible.  I wish I had her faith, her humor, her love for Abraham.  She hears what God promises and she wants to do everything she can to make that come true so  that the nations might be blessed through the offspring of her husband. Even if it means she has to suck it up and give Abraham her servant Hagar.  So maybe her efforts were a little misguided.  She didn't give up and she loved God.

Achsah of Joshua, Judges, and 1 Chronicles... When her father promised her to a man in marriage, she told her father to up the dowry. Basically "I'm worth more than just a few acres of land." What a badass.

Deborah... the only female Judge of Israel in the Old Testament. Need I say more? People used to beg her to be a part of their battles because they were too afraid to fight on their own. She was pretty freaking cool.

Hogla of Numbers and Joshua... she was one of the five daughters of Zelophehad who fought and won the right to inhereit their deceased father's property.  Back then, women were basically considered property, so the fact that she could own her father's property (it would typically go to her brothers or uncles or some distant relative) is really awesome.

Jael of Judges... she is my favorite.  Jael tricked Sisera into coming to sleep in her tent and then she drove a tent spike through his head.  This delivered the Israelites from the troops of king Jabin.  I imagine her looking around at all the chaos and death going and and thinking, "well if all these men can't handle it, then I'm going to do this myself!"  She is pretty much the coolest.

Junia... one of the outstanding woman apostles.  She was a colleague of Paul and he apparently thought very highly of her.  Reason #975 why I don't think Paul wrote mean things about women in his letters.  Anyone who is able to hang with Paul and tolerate his incessant preaching and obsession with Jesus is worth a place on this list.

Ruth... she stayed with her mother Naomi because she knew that Naomi would need comfort and guidance after the death of all of her sons and husband.  Ruth is one of the most selfless, beautiful women in the Bible.  She is also the only one who has a whole book about her.  Not only that, but Naomi is kind of an awesome trickster and tricked a man into marrying Ruth and giving her a life. I love cunning women.  Sometimes I like to pretend I'm that clever.

Mary... I basically love all of the Marys in the Bible, but I especially like Mary, the sister of Martha. She sat at the feet of Jesus and listened to him teach while other people were probably looking at her like she was a freak.  You see, she wasn't doing the social norm of that time... she should have been up hosting with her sister Martha.  Martha even calls her on it!  But Mary is just perfectly content being with her Savior, no matter what is going on around her.

Rebekah... a lot of people don't really like Rebekah because she had a favorite son. But she is so smart! She dresses her favorite son up and makes sure he gets the blessing from their dying father.  So maybe she's not super honest, but she is killer smart.  

I like women who take things into their own hands. Women who stand up for what they believe in. Women who know what they want and are out to get it.  The Proverbs 31 woman sounds nice for a while, but her obedience to her husband and mundane days of making garments and planting vineyards sounds like a drag.

So here's hoping my future husband likes more of a Jael-type of girl!

In preparation for Haiti

Most of you know this, but I went to Honduras for eleven days in January.  I haven't been able to go more than about 20 hours without thinking about that experience and how much I want to go back.  I might not get the opportunity to go back to Honduras, but I'm hoping to travel again this January.

The professor with whom I traveled takes a group to Haiti on the years he doesn't go to Honduras.

I am elated about Haiti.

I loved my experience in Honduras so much that I cannot even imagine how much fun I'll have in Haiti.  I just want to hang out with kids again.  Sweat in the sweet heat and giggle with some kids on the front porch of a school.  I've been Googling things about Haiti for the last week in anticipation. 34% of the population is younger than fourteen.  I couldn't be more excited.

Haiti intimidates me.

I don't know how to speak even a tiny bit of French.  And French Creole sounds even more exhausting.  How am I going to connect with people when I can't understand anything? When I can't speak anything?  But if I learned anything while I was in Honduras, it's that laughter and silliness are languages without distinctions.  I might be alright.

My heart breaks for Haiti.

Haiti was the first post-colonial black-led nation in the world.  They endured so much persecution by the Spanish and French over the years that their government has been pretty unstable for its entire existence.  It is currently the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere.  Poorer than Honduras? I think to myself. How my heart breaks for the people there.

Haiti is hurting.

In 2010, an earthquake struck Haiti, killing over 300,000 people and leaving over 1.5 million people homeless.  Four years later, they still haven't recovered.  They may never fully recover.  Their environment is subject to extensive deforestation and soil erosion.  And there is barely enough potable water to provide everyone with enough throughout the year.

Haiti can teach me so much.

Over 95% of Haitian citizens are black.  Over half of the population practices voodoo (although the census says that they are 80% Roman Catholic).  I am so incredibly interested in the culture there.  Not as a specimen of study, but as people I'd love to have relationships with.

I am so excited to meet my brothers and sisters in Haiti.  I'm going to be hitting everyone up for money soon.  It makes me ill to ask for money like this, but these trips are formational and completely priceless to the ministry for which God is calling me.