Strive for justice and peace in all the earth

"To strive for justice and peace in all the earth is a kind of crescendo at the end of our baptismal commitments. To paraphrase the Gospel according to John, when 'people love darkness more than the light' (3:19), we don’t respond with condemnation but instead by shining Christ’s light to expose the weakness of the shadows." 

This is how Rev. Drew Tucker, the University Pastor at Capital University describes the final baptismal promise. 

Finding time to care about-- let along do anything about-- justice and peace while we are in college can feel incredibly overwhelming. I have heard a lot of critiques of my generation (millennials) and the generations after mine. Whether we are snowflakes, self-absorbed, social media crazed, obsessed with avocado toast, or killing various restaurant chains and industries, there seem to be many reasons to complain about college students these days. Many older people assert that things should just go back to the "good old days" before complications like smart phones and empathy. 

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't critical of my own and younger generations at times, but I find so much hope in young adults today as well. It is probably the reason I have a passion for young adult and campus ministry. Not a day goes by that the deep convictions and empathy of people younger than myself teach me to be more like Jesus. 

Indeed, campus ministry is often where the journey in pursuit of justice and peace begin for many people. Josh Hayes, a previous student at Jacob's Porch puts it this way: 

"Campus ministry was where I first heard the term social justice. Nearly everyone I know from JP (Jacob's Porch) is still extremely active in the realm of justice and the pursuit of peace. Though it can be difficult to work toward justice, the knowledge of what it means to those who have been treated unjustly is the most compelling call to action."

Pastor Tucker confirms this idea that sometimes campus ministry is where the roots of justice and peace take hold of God's children and refuse to be pulled up.  

"In my various experience in Lutheran campus ministry, I’ve seen students take the lead on including people who identify as LGBTQ+ fully in the life of the church. I’ve seen campus communities open their empty housing to refugee families in need. I’ve seen white, straight, cisgendered, male students use their privilege to center the voices of people of color, women, immigrants, and others typically marginalized in our society. Most recently, I’ve been invited to celebrate the transition of a student in worship with an affirmation of baptism that honors God's grace offered long before the transition and is now experienced anew in the fullness of his life. For me, campus ministry is where the light of God’s call for justice and peace pierces the shadowy veils of judgment with God’s expansive, inclusive love."

As busy as college students often are, I and others have witnessed over and over again the drive and passion that students have for seeking justice and peace in the places and times they live in today. I have never heard a student say, "I know there is a lot of suffering in the world, but I can't do anything about it now. Let me wait until I graduate." Rather, I more often hear students say things like, "I know there is suffering and injustice in the world, and right here on this campus. How can I be a part of the change right now?"

Although campus ministry doesn't always get it right and we have a long way to go to look like the Kin-dom of God, I love being able to reply, "by joining in what we are doing at campus ministry, you can help us change not only this community but this campus and the world."  

My education after seminary

I had never worked in the food industry before this spring. I don't regret having to work in a restaurant as a hostess to make ends meet. We have to do what we have to do between graduation and first call. I've learned a lot and come to appreciate the service industry even more than I did before. That saying (I don't know if it's actually a saying) that "everyone should work in the food service industry at least once," is very true.

So here are some things I have learned while working in a restaurant...


Ice cream solves a multitude of problems. My manager's go-to move when someone is upset or an order is made wrong (over and over again) is to send the table ice cream (actually gelato because we think we are fancy). And let me tell you, people are totally into it. They are delighted to get free ice cream after their meal. The other day, we had a little girl come in with her parents and she was just WAILING. She wanted ice cream and she wanted it about ten minutes ago. As I sat them, I mentioned to her mother that we have gelato (pft). The wailing stopped as the gelato-posing-as-ice-cream was delivered. Ice cream solves everything, y'all. It just does.

Your education means nothing if you aren't nice. I was chatting with a fellow hostess, exchanging stories, and asking about her life. She said she is currently working at Tazza because she just got out of a bad relationship and had to move back in with her parents. As I mentioned that I had just finished my master's degree. "How old are you?" she asked. I replied that I'm 25. She said, "I feel so under-accomplished! You're younger than me and you have a master's degree!" I was quick to point out that we are both working the same job for the same wage. Education means absolutely nothing when you're in the same lot in life.

The 5/10 rule makes a lot of sense in real life. In restaurant business there is a rule that says if someone is within ten feet of you, you should acknowledge the person with a smile or a "hello." If you are within five feet of a person, you should greet them and offer to assist them. As an introvert, it is really easy for me to dip my head when people walk down the street or greet me in a grocery store. Since working in a restaurant, I have greeted a lot more people in my day to life. This is also a "rule" that I think is invaluable in ministry, whether we tell our worship greeters about the "rule" or using it in our lives everyday.

People just want to be treated like human beings. Whether it is the chef, the line cooks, the host, the servers, or the guests, we simply want to be treated like human beings. Whatever that means to you might vary, but to me it means that people who are in the service industry are people. People who go to eat in restaurants are people. It's not super complicated. I don't think that one person is any better than the other. Sure, I work in a restaurant where I can't afford the food, but that doesn't mean I should be treated like a someone who is less than human. It's probably too much to ask, but you know, I'm an optimist.

Keep your feet underneath you. I'm not the most graceful person in the world. I was slipping and sliding on the kitchen floor the other day and someone said, "keep your feet underneath you." That sounds like common sense, but it's more about not cutting corners or going too fast. And I can really use that advice. I'm pretty good at going too fast and forgetting to take a look around and appreciate my life.

So I guess what I'm saying is that I'm really enjoying working at the restaurant, and it is teaching me a lot. I hope I don't have to work there forever, but I'll take these lessons with me into ministry and whatever is next in life.

Self worth & the Church

One of the many incredible blessings I have been given here in Malaysia is the opportunity to engage in continuing education with pastors from very diverse backgrounds. Together we have learned (and reviewed) confessional texts, the sacraments, and ecclesiology. This week I had the opportunity to sit in a counseling/family systems seminar where we talked about different family system theories and what they look like in our contexts.

The first session explored the work of Adlerian and Satir who focused a lot on self-worth and a sense of inferiority respectively. They found in the families they observed, where there was most dysfunction was where there was a distorted or lower sense of self-worth (something that tends to compound with more dysfunction). But where people were encouraged to explore their potential, have genuine connection with people, and gain more self-awareness, they flourished and created more functional, nurturing families because of it.

And it got me thinking about a type of family system that deals directly with these two issues: the church.

Suspending the pitfalls that come with equating the church or a particular church community with a family, we can see some very obvious similarities (and dysfunctions). Even Jesus and Paul talk about the body of Christ in similar verbiage used to talk about the family unit (Hebrews 10, Romans 12, Matthew 12, Acts 2).

And realizing that the "goal" or "purpose" of the body of Christ is not to "make people feel good," but to bring about a wholeness and shalom, we can start to make connections between this seemingly secular social science and how we do ministry. 

How does the church inform people's self-worth? 
What do our sermons or our bible studies covey to members about their potential in this world? 
Do we, as a congregation, encourage people to gain more self-awareness? 
Are there genuine connections happening between people within our congregations? 

About a year ago, I studied a large, complex church organization called NewSpring in Columbia, South Carolina. Overall, the church has probably hundreds of thousands of members, but the campus we were studying only had a couple thousand people regularly attending. And their numbers were growing every year with no indication of slowing down. 

You might think (as we did) that a congregation like this could only keep growing because they were "selling" something that people wanted or felt they needed to "buy." While this might be true to some extent, we also found something else while studying the "strategies" of this church organization. 

They make people feel like they matter. 

From even before joining the worship service, we were greeted as if we were vital to the ministry there. We received special parking for being visitors, we were ushered into a green room and given swag, and we were given a tour of the whole facility afterwards. People who noticed we were visitors greeted us warmly with smiles and genuine "we are so glad you're here." Somehow, for some reason, we mattered to these people, we mattered to this church. It was a refreshing feeling, honestly. And they knew we weren't looking to change congregations. They knew were we attending for research and not for worship. And they still wanted us to know that we were worthy of their time and love.

Now I am not endorsing raffling off cars or even providing visitors with swag on their way into the church, but it is something to take note of.

I've been a visitor in way too many congregations where I have been ignored. Sometimes it's worse than being ignored - I was actively stared at for being a visitor. I remember "taking" a member's pew one Sunday and actually being asked to move back a row!

I can go on and into the true, deep life of the church and how it often lacks this sense of "worthiness" for the congregant, but I think talking about how we greet our visitors is a good enough place to start.

Do we usher them in with smiles and conversation or simply thrust a bulletin into their hands?
Could we pick them our in group after the service and remember their names?
Do we make the time to follow up with them afterwards? Invite them to dinner? Ask how we might be praying for them?
Do we learn about them first before trying to "sell" the congregation's programs to them?

How do we provide hospitality in a way that says, "we want you here, we think your gifts are a perfect match for our passions" instead of, "we need you here to pay our bills with your tithe - what's the minimum we have to do to keep you coming?"

While I don't think it's the whole story, I believe that thinking about the role of people's sense of self-worth is an important building block of how we do ministry together. Shalom, I believe, starts with a person's own identity and self-worth. How then, as bringers of shalom, can we nurture and ignite a more holy sense of self-worth for everyone who walks through the doors of our congregation?

Generational Love

Ruth 1:1-18

Psalm 146

Hebrews 9:11-14

Mark 12: 28-34

There are 4,200 different religions in the world.  There are 5,000 ethnic groups in the world.  There are 318 MILLION people in the United States alone.  But we aren’t just diverse as a people, we are diverse as generations.  There are more people over 50 living in the United States than any other time in all of history.  That’s pretty awesome.  But it just shows how completely different and spread out people are throughout the country, but also throughout the Church.  If you look around this morning, there are all sort of different people who come from completely different places and live such different lives.  And we are all different ages and grew up in different generations. 

Things are different than they were five, ten, twenty years ago.  I see you smiling.  You know what I’m talking about. Everything has changed - how we communicate has changed from hand-written letters to telegrams to phone calls and text messages.  How we raise our children has changed with electronics and schools transforming.  Even the way we worship has changed.  My parents had no idea what “contemporary worship” meant when they were growing up.  

And let’s be honest, it divides us.  There are many people who love traditional worship, many people who love contemporary.  There are a lot of people who say no cell phones for kids until they are fifteen years old and some who will give in around 8 years old.  Generations are different and I think it’s a good thing.  It is certainly a natural change.  

But there is something that unifies us.  And I think Jesus and Ruth both get to it in these passages.  You heard most of the backstory with Ruth - her husband dies and there is no other relative to take as her husband.  Naomi does such a noble thing there with Ruth - she tells her to go back to her people and find a husband so that she might not have to live a lonely life and a life of poverty.  Naomi didn’t have to give Ruth that blessing... and Ruth certainly could have taken that blessing and left.  But she did something different.  She, because she felt connected to Naomi in a deeper way than just being her daughter-in-law, stays with Naomi and loves her like her own mother.  I think as a church, we can really learn from that.  

They weren’t from the same tribe of people, they didn’t have the same friends.   But something connected them.  Somehow, during their time together, Naomi was able to pass down something so incredibly vital for Ruth, that Ruth wasn’t willing to part from her.  She knew she would live in poverty and that she could never marry another man and have children.  This meant shame and complete loneliness during that time.  But there was a love and connection that kept Ruth from following her sister-in-law back to her old life.  Naomi had instilled in Ruth the traditions of her people and the value of her religion.  

“Do not press me to leave you
    or to turn back from following you!
Where you go, I will go;
    where you lodge, I will lodge;
your people shall be my people,
    and your God my God.

Where you die, I will die—
    there will I be buried.
May the Lord do thus and so to me,
    and more as well,
if even death parts me from you!”

That is beautiful. 

It was the unity of God and the unity of kinship that kept those women together, even through the most difficult time in their lives.  But it wasn’t just the kinship and unity of God, it was love.  Naomi loved Ruth enough to allow her to go back to her family and find another husband and live a fruitful life.  And we know how much Ruth loved her mother-in-law - enough to stay with her and live a life of poverty.  

In the gospel, Jesus tells us that the two most important commandments are to  “love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength” and  "You shall love your neighbor as yourself."

Naomi was able to pass down both of these commandments to Ruth.  

One of the most incredible things we are able to pass down to young people is love.  I believe, as a child of two wonderful parents that the most important thing they taught me was how to love.  They were good at it, after all.  They love each other and they love my brother and me.  I can’t think of a single time growing up that I didn’t feel my parents’ love for me.  And I don’t think that they just woke up on the morning of becoming parents and decided to learn how to love.  It’s something that their parents taught them and their grandparents passed down as well.  Love is something that is almost necessarily passed down from generation to generation.  It is love that we have in common with all of the generations before us and all of the generation after us.  It was the love of God and the love of one another that kept Ruth and Naomi together.  

We have that same type of love that keeps us together as a church body.  We have the love of Christ.  We have a unity of spirit that is able to hold us together through space and time - through the generations and through the diversity of the world.  We have unity because of the Trinitarian God.  God so loved this world and Jesus Christ died for the love of the world.  The Holy Spirit was given to the church to remain and nurture the church.  It was given in order to be a comforter, a guide, and a way to keep the church unified.  

Our response to this gift of love and commitment that our God has given us so freely is these two commandments.  Love God with all of your heart and all of your mind and all of your soul.  And love your neighbor as yourself.  This response is meant to keep the church together and provide real relationship within the church and outside of the church.

We celebrate this unity and this relationship in two sacred ways in the Lutheran church - the waters of baptism and Holy Communion.  Baptism is a reminder that we belong in God’s family.  Communion is a celebration and remembrance that we are in this together.  And the really cool part is that it’s not just this church that is unified in Christ.  We are together with all of the saints and sinners throughout all of time and space.  Our grandparents and great-grandparents.  People who have yet to be born.  Every generation and throughout the entire world, we are all of one spirit in Christ Jesus.  

Things are going to keep changing.  Generations will continue to feel further and further apart.  The world will continue to expand and diversify.  But if we are able to teach people of all ages that the two greatest commandments are to love God with all your heart and all your mind and all your soul and to love your neighbor as yourself, the unity of the spirit in Jesus Christ cannot be broken.  

Biblical Women I'd Rather Be than the Proverbs 31 Woman

You have probably all heard of the Proverbs 31 woman. I have seen so many young men claim that they wish they could find a Proverbs 31 woman to marry. Or others who claim to have found a Proverbs 31 woman and just can't wait to make her their wife! Woohoo!

She is a capable wife.
She imports her food from far away.
She makes all her own clothes.
She gets up really early and cooks for her husband.
She works out.
Her husband is super popular.
She has her own business.
Her husband praises her.
She is submissive.
She lives for the will of her husband.
Oh yeah, and God too.

I don't have a huge problem with all of these things. Fearing God is cool. Owning your own business is pretty swell. But it doesn't say things like "sometimes she does things for herself because she's worth that."  It doesn't say that her husband helps her cook and clean because he recognizes the fact that being a mother and wife is actually pretty difficult work.  It doesn't say that she is independent and courageous.

She lives for her husband and for God.  And probably her children (although they are barely mentioned).

I guess there are worse things to live for.

But I would rather be one of these women of the Bible.

Sarah... obviously Sarah has to be one of my favorite women of the Bible.  I wish I had her faith, her humor, her love for Abraham.  She hears what God promises and she wants to do everything she can to make that come true so  that the nations might be blessed through the offspring of her husband. Even if it means she has to suck it up and give Abraham her servant Hagar.  So maybe her efforts were a little misguided.  She didn't give up and she loved God.

Achsah of Joshua, Judges, and 1 Chronicles... When her father promised her to a man in marriage, she told her father to up the dowry. Basically "I'm worth more than just a few acres of land." What a badass.

Deborah... the only female Judge of Israel in the Old Testament. Need I say more? People used to beg her to be a part of their battles because they were too afraid to fight on their own. She was pretty freaking cool.

Hogla of Numbers and Joshua... she was one of the five daughters of Zelophehad who fought and won the right to inhereit their deceased father's property.  Back then, women were basically considered property, so the fact that she could own her father's property (it would typically go to her brothers or uncles or some distant relative) is really awesome.

Jael of Judges... she is my favorite.  Jael tricked Sisera into coming to sleep in her tent and then she drove a tent spike through his head.  This delivered the Israelites from the troops of king Jabin.  I imagine her looking around at all the chaos and death going and and thinking, "well if all these men can't handle it, then I'm going to do this myself!"  She is pretty much the coolest.

Junia... one of the outstanding woman apostles.  She was a colleague of Paul and he apparently thought very highly of her.  Reason #975 why I don't think Paul wrote mean things about women in his letters.  Anyone who is able to hang with Paul and tolerate his incessant preaching and obsession with Jesus is worth a place on this list.

Ruth... she stayed with her mother Naomi because she knew that Naomi would need comfort and guidance after the death of all of her sons and husband.  Ruth is one of the most selfless, beautiful women in the Bible.  She is also the only one who has a whole book about her.  Not only that, but Naomi is kind of an awesome trickster and tricked a man into marrying Ruth and giving her a life. I love cunning women.  Sometimes I like to pretend I'm that clever.

Mary... I basically love all of the Marys in the Bible, but I especially like Mary, the sister of Martha. She sat at the feet of Jesus and listened to him teach while other people were probably looking at her like she was a freak.  You see, she wasn't doing the social norm of that time... she should have been up hosting with her sister Martha.  Martha even calls her on it!  But Mary is just perfectly content being with her Savior, no matter what is going on around her.

Rebekah... a lot of people don't really like Rebekah because she had a favorite son. But she is so smart! She dresses her favorite son up and makes sure he gets the blessing from their dying father.  So maybe she's not super honest, but she is killer smart.  

I like women who take things into their own hands. Women who stand up for what they believe in. Women who know what they want and are out to get it.  The Proverbs 31 woman sounds nice for a while, but her obedience to her husband and mundane days of making garments and planting vineyards sounds like a drag.

So here's hoping my future husband likes more of a Jael-type of girl!

In preparation for Haiti

Most of you know this, but I went to Honduras for eleven days in January.  I haven't been able to go more than about 20 hours without thinking about that experience and how much I want to go back.  I might not get the opportunity to go back to Honduras, but I'm hoping to travel again this January.

The professor with whom I traveled takes a group to Haiti on the years he doesn't go to Honduras.

I am elated about Haiti.

I loved my experience in Honduras so much that I cannot even imagine how much fun I'll have in Haiti.  I just want to hang out with kids again.  Sweat in the sweet heat and giggle with some kids on the front porch of a school.  I've been Googling things about Haiti for the last week in anticipation. 34% of the population is younger than fourteen.  I couldn't be more excited.

Haiti intimidates me.

I don't know how to speak even a tiny bit of French.  And French Creole sounds even more exhausting.  How am I going to connect with people when I can't understand anything? When I can't speak anything?  But if I learned anything while I was in Honduras, it's that laughter and silliness are languages without distinctions.  I might be alright.

My heart breaks for Haiti.

Haiti was the first post-colonial black-led nation in the world.  They endured so much persecution by the Spanish and French over the years that their government has been pretty unstable for its entire existence.  It is currently the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere.  Poorer than Honduras? I think to myself. How my heart breaks for the people there.

Haiti is hurting.

In 2010, an earthquake struck Haiti, killing over 300,000 people and leaving over 1.5 million people homeless.  Four years later, they still haven't recovered.  They may never fully recover.  Their environment is subject to extensive deforestation and soil erosion.  And there is barely enough potable water to provide everyone with enough throughout the year.

Haiti can teach me so much.

Over 95% of Haitian citizens are black.  Over half of the population practices voodoo (although the census says that they are 80% Roman Catholic).  I am so incredibly interested in the culture there.  Not as a specimen of study, but as people I'd love to have relationships with.

I am so excited to meet my brothers and sisters in Haiti.  I'm going to be hitting everyone up for money soon.  It makes me ill to ask for money like this, but these trips are formational and completely priceless to the ministry for which God is calling me.

Give to everyone who asks

Give to everyone who asks.
Emphasis on the ask. 

I must confess, this particular post was conceived after reading another seminarian's blog post from about a week ago.  His point (which is obviously a very valid point) is that we are to give to everyone who asks.  Period.  The end.  Not "give to everyone who asks and seems to have need," not "give to everyone who asks and is willing to repay you," not "give to everyone who asks and seems like they're telling the truth."  We are called to give to everyone who asks.

Luke 6:30 says, "Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back."

Matthew 5:42 says, "Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you."

But what if we are only called to give to those who ask.  Not the people we see as having a need.  Not the people we hope we can fix or help in order to get something out of it ourselves.  Not the people who are high profile and the world presents as "needy."

One of my biggest flaws is that I think I can fix things that I simply cannot fix.  Actually, I think I can and should fix things that people have no intention of fixing or don't want help in fixing.  I'm a chronic fixer.  A codependent fixer.  I want people to fix me too.

But I rarely wait for people to ask.  I never wait for "what do you think?" before giving my opinion.  I rarely wait for "how should I do it?" before letting them know how I would do it.  I barely ever wait for "can you help?" before I've offered three or four solutions to a problem.

What if this phrase is a commentary on our mission as a church?  What if the author intentionally didn't write, "give to everyone?"  What if we aren't supposed to walk into the impoverished part of town and declare their needs and hold out our hands for the "needy?"

I think it is especially an important self-care issue for caregivers.  We aren't going to be able to help all of the people who we think need help.  We aren't going to be able to help all of the people who we think deserve help or would benefit from help.  But we are able to help the people who ask for help.

Think about it: how many times did Jesus roll up, diagnose people, and decide to solve their problems?  Not too many times. In fact, in most of the time people are flocking to Jesus and asking for his help.  Of course, he responds appropriately to every single person- he helps them.  Even when he's in the middle of helping someone else.  Then after he helps people, he oftentimes retreats to the mountainside, the lake, or the wilderness to take care of himself.

Maybe this blog post isn't really going anywhere. (Did it go anywhere?) But I'll leave you with this:

Give to everyone who asks you.

CPE

CPE stands for Crazy People Emoting.

CPE stands for Creating Proper Empathy.

CPE stands for Crummy Perspectives on Everything.

CPE stands for Cram-Packed Emotions.

CPE stands for Constantly Praying for the Eschaton.

CPE stands for Clinical Pastoral Education.

I'm a chaplain at a hospital here in Columbia for eleven weeks this summer.  CPE is the infamous horror story told by every middler to every incoming junior at seminary.  The tales are tall and sometimes exaggerated.

But when I first started CPE I had all of those stories in my head.  And I was terrified.  I was furious.  I didn't want to be there.  I didn't know what would happen when I started orientation six weeks ago.  I thought about fighting "the man" (who in this case in my candidacy committee and the entire ELCA) and throwing a fit until I didn't have to do CPE.  Because I thought that would work. Ha.

I just thought it was pointless. I had a normal childhood. I have a good relationship with my parents. My brother is weird but functional.  I have good friendships that go back for years.  I'm now in a relationship that is most definitely the most healthy romantic relationship I've ever been a part of.  I didn't need this CPE thing and all the crap that came with it.

I also didn't think I had any authority to walk into someone's hospital room and ask them to share their shit with me.  Who do I think I am that I might make a tiny bit of difference for anyone ever?  Psh. That's some wishful thinking that I'll "touch" someone or that I'd actually benefit from delving into my own shit during group sessions.

But look at me.  The girl who wanted so badly to hate chaplaincy is loving it and constantly talking about it.  Weird.

I learned a few things these past few weeks:

1. No matter how you were raised or what kind of family you come from, it's really nice to talk to someone who is paid to listen to you.
2. If you look for disaster and depressing situations, you're going to find them.
3. If you look for miracles and small joys throughout the day, you're going to find them.
4. Music can pretty much explain any sort of emotion you're feeling at any given moment.
5. "Talking through" things isn't something annoying people do, it's something healthy people do.
6. Community is insanely important because of #5.
7. You're never going to be perfect, so you might as well take some risks.

I can't share any of my awesome stories yet because of HIPAA stuff, but I have some awesome stories.  I have fallen in love with ministry.  I have fallen in love with caring for people.  I have fallen in love with the helplessness of crises.  I have fallen in love with what God is doing through the people here at the hospital and through me.

I'm still learning and I'm still pretty much scared to death, but I'm here.  I'm in it and I'm not hating it.  Actually half of me wants to recommend it to everyone who plans to care for another human being anytime during their life.  Half of me wants to run away from trauma pages and Code Blue's and half of me wants to run toward the families with open arms and an open heart.

I'm torn and broken and so in love.